Baby Blessings

My cheeks are still tear stained..I can't dry my eyes.  I saw a fb friend's status today about remembering her angel in heaven.  I saw another friend's status about praying for the family of a baby who just died.  I found these two stories (don't look at them if you don't want to cry)!   Mamie       Miller

My heart just hurts.  I can't even describe it.  I can't imagine the pain of giving birth to a stillborn or having a baby in heaven after only a few weeks here.  I know the pain of miscarriage, but not having carried a baby full term and loosing her.  I have a few friends who have been there.  Yet they have hope.  I guess that's the only way to keep going....to believe that God has a plan for it. 

So...even though I'm still crying this was good for me to consider.  I've had a rough week with my girls....but I have them!  They are with me, I can feel their sweet warm skin and smell their breath and stroke their hair and hear them giggle.  They may not always listen or do what I would like, but they are full of love and energy...and they are here!!! 

• I will remember how blessed I am to have such sweet girls the next time they are whining or screaming or not sleeping. 
• I will remember that God chose me to be their momma and He has a plan for their lives and mine. 
• I will remember that God will give me all I need to be their momma...so when I am short on patience I will go to Him. 

Thank you Jesus for this reminder today!  Thank you for giving me the opportunity to be a momma.  Let me never take it for granted.  Remind me that it is your strength that will make me the momma I desire to be.  Let me always be thankful for the precious girls you have given me.  Lord, comfort those who have lost their babies-just hold them. You have a plan for their pain-you will heal their hurts...call them to you!  Thank you Lord for your goodness and mercy.  In Jesus name.  Amen

Darkness

I have been feeling sad...don't know why...just struggling right now.  My sweet husband came and took the girls for a couple of hours this morning so I could pray and get better.  Life today was on in the background before the girls left and I heard them talking about being free and discussing Psalm 74.  So I turned there and this stood out to me:

Do not hand over the life of your dove to wild beasts;

do not forget the lives of your afflicted people forever.
Have regard for your covenant,
because haunts of violence fill the dark places of the land.
Do not let the oppressed retreat in disgrace;
may the poor and needy praise your name.
Psalm 74:19-21

This is how I feel today.  I know we can't always trust our feelings...but today I feel afflicted and oppressed.  It helps me to know that I am not the only one to ever feel this way. I remember the freedom I felt when I received that revelation-David was up and down emotionally and he was described as a man after God's own heart.  Elijah was a prophet and still ran...after God powerfully showed himself.  (see 1 Kings 18).  So if these men can still be used by God, so can I-I will not be condemned for my feelings. 

Father's love letter

This is a precious letter I found on another blog this morning....click here to watch it on video, or just read it below. 

My Child,


You may not know me,

but I know everything about you.

Psalm 139:1



I know when you sit down and when you rise up.

Psalm 139:2



I am familiar with all your ways.

Psalm 139:3



Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.

Matthew 10:29-31



For you were made in my image.

Genesis 1:27



In me you live and move and have your being.

Acts 17:28



For you are my offspring.

Acts 17:28



I knew you even before you were conceived.

Jeremiah 1:4-5



I chose you when I planned creation.

Ephesians 1:11-12



You were not a mistake,

for all your days are written in my book.

Psalm 139:15-16



I determined the exact time of your birth

and where you would live.

Acts 17:26



You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Psalm 139:14



I knit you together in your mother's womb.

Psalm 139:13



And brought you forth on the day you were born.

Psalm 71:6



I have been misrepresented

by those who don't know me.

John 8:41-44



I am not distant and angry,

but am the complete expression of love.

1 John 4:16



And it is my desire to lavish my love on you.

1 John 3:1



Simply because you are my child

and I am your Father.

1 John 3:1



I offer you more than your earthly father ever could.

Matthew 7:11



For I am the perfect father.

Matthew 5:48



Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand.

James 1:17



For I am your provider and I meet all your needs.

Matthew 6:31-33



My plan for your future has always been filled with hope.

Jeremiah 29:11



Because I love you with an everlasting love.

Jeremiah 31:3



My thoughts toward you are countless

as the sand on the seashore.

Psalms 139:17-18



And I rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17



I will never stop doing good to you.

Jeremiah 32:40



For you are my treasured possession.

Exodus 19:5



I desire to establish you

with all my heart and all my soul.

Jeremiah 32:41



And I want to show you great and marvelous things.

Jeremiah 33:3



If you seek me with all your heart,

you will find me.

Deuteronomy 4:29



Delight in me and I will give you

the desires of your heart.

Psalm 37:4



For it is I who gave you those desires.

Philippians 2:13



I am able to do more for you

than you could possibly imagine.

Ephesians 3:20



For I am your greatest encourager.

2 Thessalonians 2:16-17



I am also the Father who comforts you

in all your troubles.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4



When you are brokenhearted,

I am close to you.

Psalm 34:18



As a shepherd carries a lamb,

I have carried you close to my heart.

Isaiah 40:11



One day I will wipe away

every tear from your eyes.

Revelation 21:3-4



And I'll take away all the pain

you have suffered on this earth.

Revelation 21:3-4



I am your Father, and I love you

even as I love my son, Jesus.

John 17:23



For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed.

John 17:26



He is the exact representation of my being.

Hebrews 1:3



He came to demonstrate that I am for you,

not against you.

Romans 8:31



And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.

2 Corinthians 5:18-19



Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.

2 Corinthians 5:18-19



His death was the ultimate expression

of my love for you.

1 John 4:10



I gave up everything I loved

that I might gain your love.

Romans 8:31-32



If you receive the gift of my son Jesus,

you receive me.

1 John 2:23



And nothing will ever separate you

from my love again.

Romans 8:38-39



Come home and I'll throw the biggest party

heaven has ever seen.

Luke 15:7



I have always been Father,

and will always be Father.

Ephesians 3:14-15



My question is…

Will you be my child?

John 1:12-13



I am waiting for you.

Luke 15:11-32



Love, Your Dad



Father's Love Letter used by permission Father Heart Communications


© 1999-2011 www.FathersLoveLetter.com

Hot Dog

It's HOT here!  Last week several men were in the heat all day (and all night in some cases) to make hot rod camp a success by sharing the love of Christ with 10 boys.  A week ago Saturday we got to hear the start up of the 1923 T bucket and the 1997 sportster that the youth from Tulsa Boys Home put together that week at Hot Rod Camp with the guidance of some dedicated men (including my husband!!!).  It was awesome for me to hear my husband address the crowd and tell the kids that the bike was cool but the reason they were there was to share the love of Christ.  It was also great to hear those same boys tell of the week as the best of their lives!  Last Sunday my heart was so happy hearing my husband speak in front of our church family telling what Hot Rod Camp had meant to him. 

1923 T Bucket that was restored during HRC 2011

Seeing the men work on this project had me thinking alot about my daddy.  This is something he would have LOVED to do.  He had a 1916 Model T (and some others I can't recall) that he had planned to restore before he died.  As I thought about how much I respect the men working at hot rod camp, I realized that I hadn't really respected my daddy.  Recently, I had a conversation with my baby brother about our daddy and I was amazed at the nice things he had to say about daddy.  That led me to think about how I saw daddy and what needed to change. 



One of the cars Daddy had around 1990

After realizing that I didn't properly respect my daddy while he was here on earth, I recalled this verse:

Where there is no vision [no redemptive revelation of God], the people perish; but he who keeps the law [of God, which includes that of man]--blessed (happy, fortunate, and enviable) is he.  Proverbs 29:18 I never had a redemptive revelation of my daddy....meaning that I never saw him through the blood of Jesus.  I saw him as an alcoholic and experienced that rejection as his little girl. 

I thought that I had forgiven him, but I see that it wasn't complete before now.  Even though my daddy wasn't able to meet all my needs as a little girl and made many mistakes-he is forgiven.  He put his trust in Jesus and became sober shortly before he died.  I saw the change and try to always remember those times, but never really let go of the hurts from before that time. When my daddy but his trust in Jesus, he was made brand new!!

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 2 Corinthians 5:17

Because daddy trusted in Jesus he was justified...it's just as if he'd done everything right.   This is what Jesus did for me when I fully put my trust in Him, it's what He did for my daddy when he trusted him, and it's what He will do for all who call out to Him and fully trust in His finished work on the cross for their salvation! 

Instead of their shame my people will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace they will rejoice in their inheritance; and so they will inherit a double portion in their land, and everlasting joy will be theirs. Isaiah 61:7

My daddy and I ~1978

On this father's day I am thankful for my daddy.  I am thankful for the grace to fully forgive him and I choose to see him through the blood of Jesus.  Daddy was a hard worker and did his best to care for his family.  I think if he were still alive today his life would demonstrate the righteousness Jesus gave him. 

I am thankful for my husband who is a wonderful daddy to our precious girls.  I am thankful for the redemptive revelation of him- that he is the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus and that I can teach my girls to respect and admire him. 

  

My family with Harley that was customized at HRC 2011



On a lighter note...the title of this post comes from one of Aleigha's prayers.  This two-year old's prayers are just precious, as seems she usually just copies what she has heard prayed before.  One of her prayers last week was "Amen God made hot dog camp, Amen God made my daddy work hot dog camp".  Obviously, not knowing what Hot Rod camp was, she just filled in with a word she knew and gave us many giggles:)! Yep-she says her Amen first, it's really cute to her momma, she's done it like this since she first started praying by herself.  Now that I think about it, it's really neat-she's saying she believes what she prays before she even says it! For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God. 2 Corinthians 1:20

Rest

Isaiah 30:15
This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says:

“In repentance and rest is your salvation,
in quietness and trust is your strength,
but you would have none of it.

Oh, Lord, let us not be like the obstinate nation...let us repent and rest in you.  Let us get our strength in queitness and trust....for the JOY of you Lord is our strength.  Lord as I type these words I am trying to "do" many things...get my email cleaned out, edit some blog posts, etc...Lord let me just "be"-quiet. Let me just rest in you!  Take the pressure off me to get my to-do list done.  Show me if there is any "work" that I need to lay down.  Remind me that it is not my performance that will get me through this life-it is the blood of Jesus!  I trust in and rely upon you-I will rest, for I know you are working in me to will and to do what pleases you.  Thank you that I can rest even while going about everyday tasks.  I don't have to worry about how to get it all done....I trust in your guidance! In Jesus name, AMEN

Are you tired???

Lord your Word tells us to come to You when we are weary and burdened, and You will give us rest. Lord, let us take your yoke upon us and learn from you, for you are gentle and humble in heart, and we will find rest for our souls. for your yoke is easy and your burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30)

God we know that you are not unjust; You will not forget our work and the love we have shown You as we have helped your people and continue to help them. Let each of us show this same diligence to the very end, in order to make our hope sure. Do not let us become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised. (Hebrews 6:10-12)

Thank you that we will not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. (Gal 6:9) Thank you that we will not be lacking in zeal, but You will keep our spiritual fervor, as we are serving you Lord. (Romans 12:11) We know that all hard work brings a profit, (Prov 14:23)

And we pray this in order that we may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that we may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified us to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light. To this end we labor, struggling with all YOUR energy, which so powerfully works in us.   (Col 1:10-11, 29)

Thank you Lord that You gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in You LORD will renew their strength. We will soar on wings like eagles; we will run and not grow weary, we will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:29-31)

We rest in you-Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith.  In Jesus name, AMEN!

Enchanted

I was up very early Sunday morning with a sick little one, so we snuggled on the couch and watched Enchanted.  In case you don't know me, I am NOT a movie kind of girl!  So for me to watch a movie more than once is rare (of course my kids watch the same videos over and over, but I am usually doing something else after the first viewing).  The first time I watched Enchanted was on a trip to Dallas with students a few years ago...I had nothing to do but watch the video on the bus ride, although I was not fully watching it and didn't get to see the ending.  I was surprised at how God used it to teach me the first time I saw the movie (read the post here). 
Seeing the ending of the movie made me sad Sunday. This time when I finished the movie I had some of the same negative thoughts I usually do about movies (waste of time, etc...).  I'm not really sure what emotions it brought up...but not good.  In fact, kind of put a damper on my day until I realized I was thinking so negatively and took my thoughts captive.  This writing is an attempt to sort out the negative feelings and bring them into the light of Jesus.  (It's not a new movie, but if you've not seen it and don't want to ruin it, watch it before you read on. Even if you've not seen the movie, I hope that you will still benefit from this writing).

Here's what I think I got out of it: We are like Giselle-made for our Prince (Jesus) but when we spend too much time in the world, we give up on our first love.  After being in NYC, Giselle began taking on their customs and was not as enchanted with her prince.  She spent too much time with another man and fell in love with him.  Have we done that-spent too much time with the world and desire what it has to offer more than we want what Jesus has to offer? 
Even though the movie seemed to end with a 'happily ever after' since the prince found a new bride and Giselle chose a new groom...it left me sad! I don't want to loose my first love!  I was comforted when this verse came to mind:

To him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy— to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen. Jude 24-25

He will keep me from loosing my first love! I want to fall more deeply in love with Jesus every day and let the fascination with the world grow dim.  I don't want to settle for less than my Hero-my Jesus.  I want to be ready when He comes for me and this promise remind me that he will present me with great joy!

Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready.  Revelation 19:17

Verse 18 goes on to say that the bride is wearing fine linen which is righteousness.  It has been given us to wear by the sacrifice of Christ.  I am working on a blog about clothing now...will post more later-but for now just note that Christ's sacrifice makes us ready!

The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. He must become greater; I must become less. John 3:29-30

We, the bride of Christ-belong to Him! We are his and cannot be snatched from his hand.  We can choose not to focus on Jesus, but He still loves us.  Jesus is still captivated by his bride-just as the prince was in the movie.  He was still singing to Giselle even when she lost interest. 

You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. Song of Solomon 4:9

The bride of Christ 'stole His heart' before we were even born-He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world!!! He will never give up on us even if we don't remember His promises.  Today my Z whispered in my ear "you are a princess, mommy-that will make your day better"!  What a sweet reminder!!! You too friend are a princess (or prince) as well-for your Father is the king of kings and you are the bride of the Prince of Peace.  Think about that!! 

The end of Beth Moore's teaching on Life Today confirmed what God was speaking into my heart this week.  There is a happily every after...My God will make all things new!!
“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world.  Matthew 25:34

This happily ever after is brings me much more joy and peace than thinking on a movie (now do you see why I don't do movies ;) I think too much, lol). 
The ransomed of the LORD will return. They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away. Isaiah 51:11

Lord God,  You're the King of the world.  You've stolen my heart, Yes You have! You've wiped away the stains,and broke away the chains, Yes You have!  You are able to keep my eyes on you and present me holy and without fault in your presence.  Thank you Jesus!! In your presence we become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which we shine like stars in the universe (Phil 2:15) Thank you for your mercy and grace and for the ways you speak your truth and love in my life.  I love you Lord!!!

Thanks for reading this super long blog post...and in case you are wondering I feel better now:) Sorting through feelings in the light of the Word always does that for me!

Is it worth it?

I have been wondering if taking the time to blog is worth it.  I mean there are tons of other bloggers out there who may be saying the same thing as me.  When I doubt, the Lord is quick to remind me of His promises.  He has a plan for my life and if He's guiding me to blog it has a purpose. Even if only one person comes to know Jesus more-it's worth it!

One of my primary purposes may be a teeny bit selfish.  Writing gets my thoughts out and they eventually make more sense to me.  When I blog and add tags, it allows me to recall what He has taught me.  Just this week I have used my blog posts to remember the goodness of God and His faithfulness in my life

Today I found another reason for writing and sharing what He is doing in my life.  Because people need to hear the good news!  Not that God needs me to do it, He makes himself known by His creation (Romans 1:20).  But when I follow Him, I will be blessed and I hope and pray that you will be encouraged!

Give praise to the LORD, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done. Psalm 105:1

The realization today was brought about by the circle of moms top 25 faith blogs.  I saw the post on facebook and checked it out since I am trying to interact with other bloggers.  I thought that I would find others blogging just like me-faith based....as in Christian.  I was wrong.  I frequently make the mistake of assuming people are like me in their beliefs. I was proved wrong today when the top faith blog selected was a pagan mom's blog.  I must admit, I am uneducated when it comes to the belief systems of other faiths.  This opened my eyes and reminded me that not everyone knows the good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ!!!

So, I'm going to keep chugging along and stop thinking about the number of readers.  I will leave it in the hands of my Lord and Savior who has a plan for the words He gives me.  His word is alive and active, sharper than a double-edged sword and will accomplish what He desires...bringing joy and peace!!!

As the rain and the snow

   come down from heaven,

and do not return to it

   without watering the earth

and making it bud and flourish,

   so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:

   It will not return to me empty,

but will accomplish what I desire

   and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

 You will go out in joy

   and be led forth in peace;

the mountains and hills

   will burst into song before you,

and all the trees of the field

   will clap their hands.     Isaiah 55:10-12

For the record, my blog didn't come in LAST place! I don't know who you are, but thanks to the 12 people that voted for it, lol!!! I entered it today-which was the last day to vote, so the only purpose was to get the blog out there.  I do have some traffic coming from that site (but, wait...I'm not going to focus on the numbers, right?).  I also had a new subscriber today because a sweet friend shared my blog on her facebook page! I am humbled and thankful for each of you reading this...whoever you are!!!

Forgetting God's Goodness

After the spiritual amnesia post I wrote earlier in the week, I read a Harvest Devotion via email with interest since confirmation (repeating themes) is one way God has been speaking to me. Here is a portion of it:

Have you ever forgotten God's goodness to you? Have you ever had to relearn something? I know I have. And the disciples did too. Matthew's Gospel tells us that on one occasion, the disciples had forgotten to bring bread on their journey, and they were worried about it. The feeding of the 5,000 had happened only days earlier. Then there was another miracle of the feeding of the 4,000. So what happened? They forgot. That is what happened. God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. The same God who was there for you in the past will be with you here in the present. And He will be there for you in the future as well.

Later, after they crossed to the other side of the lake, the disciples discovered they had forgotten to bring any bread. "Watch out!" Jesus warned them. "Beware of the yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees." Matthew 16:5

After the revelation over the weekend that I am prone to spiritual amnesia, this verse jumped out at me-specifically Jesus' words to beware of the yeast.  Yeast puffs up and spreads through a whole batch of dough- a little yeast goes a long way. Was the 'yeast' he was talking about here forgetting the goodness of God?

If the 'yeast' is discontentment or dissatisfaction (as I was dealing with earlier) then it only takes a bit to cause that to overflow out of your life.  If the 'yeast' is fear (that God won't provide), then it only takes a bit to impact your life.

Jesus warned the disciples to beware of the yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees, or religious people of the time.  This means we also need to be aware of the 'yeast' that we can pick up on from others.  When we are surrounded by spiritual amnesia, negativity, religion, or fear it is easy to get brought down with the group if we don't constantly focus on Jesus-the bread of life.

If we trust in and focus on Jesus and renew our minds, we won't forget God's goodness!  We will not be conformed to the pattern of this world (infected by 'yeast'), but will be transformed by the renewing of our minds. Then we will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will (Romans 12:2)!!! We will be joyful always;  pray continually;  give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for us in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 17:16-18). 

And who knows, maybe the Spirit in us will impact those around us instead of the 'yeast' infecting us!  Wait-we do know- You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. 1 John 4:4 Praise the Lord!! Jesus in us is greater than the 'yeast' and when we look to Jesus we will not forget God's goodness!

Spiritual Amnesia

Sometimes it seems like I'm always looking for something to make me happy.  Looking toward something that is coming up instead of enjoying today.  Wanting something I don't yet have that I think will make me happy instead of enjoying what God has already given me to enjoy.  Thinking that if "x" would just change, or "y" would happen, then I would be happy.  Well...I'm done with it!  I am choosing today to rejoice in the Lord always and again I say rejoice!!! I will celebrate my life just as it is and as Paul said, will learn to live in contentment no matter what my circumstances.  I have spent too many days wishing for tommorows or longing for yesterdays.  I have spent too many days forgetting the goodness of God-suffering from spiritual amnesia. 

In his book Crazy Love, Francis Chan writes about spiritual amnesia in the first chapter.  We are programmed to focus on what we don't have, bombarded multiple times throughout the day with what we need to buy that will make us feel happier or sexier or more at peace.  This dissatisfaction transfers over to our thinking about God.  We forget that we already have everything we need in Him.  Because we don't often think about the reality of who God is, we quickly forget that He is worthy to be worshipped and loved.  We are to fear Him. 

Lord, forgive me for forgetting your goodness-You are good-all the time!  Teach me to trust you and be content with your plan for my life even when it doesn't match mine.  I know your ways are higher than my ways and you have a plan that is far better than any plan I could create in my mind.  Thank you for the Joy that you make available to all who put their trust in You!  Lord fill me with your joy while I'm waiting.  Let my life overflow with the joy of the Lord-be my strength daily!  Let me not suffer from spiritual amnesia-but to constantly remember the sacrifice that Christ paid for me!! How can I keep from singing when I think on the beauty of the cross? Lift my eyes to see your faithfulness when I am discouraged.  Lord your Word reminds us that the thief comes to steal kill and destroy-but You came that we might have and ENJOY life to the full, till it overflows!!! Thank you Jesus!!!! Amen