Friday, August 6, 2010

Daddy's Girl

Today my Daddy would turn 64. I wonder what he would look like today? Would he still smell like cherry vanilla pipe tobacco? What would he be like today? If he were still here would I honor him? Would we have a birthday party? Would I still be his little girl? What would our relationship be like? Would he be proud of me? What would he think of his granddaughters? I am certain that my girls would love their Papa Boogie.
It's been almost 13 years since he died. I realized earlier in the week that I have some abandonment issues with that....daddies aren't supposed to die when you are in college. They are supposed to walk you down the aisle when you get married. They are supposed to be there to hold their grandchild. They are supposed to be someone you can count on when life is rough-a place you can go for loving arms and reassurance. A strong place, a protector, someone who will always love you and look out for you....that's what Daddies are supposed to be.
But I don't have my Daddy...Why? Have you ever heard the saying 'Don't ask God why, ask Him what can I learn from this?' Well I did ask Him earlier this week. Here's what I can learn:
Maybe it's so I can learn to trust my heavenly Father, even while I'm on earth. So I can learn that He's the One I can count on when life is rough, He's the place I can go for loving arms and reassurance. He is my strong place, my protector. He is the one who will always love me and look out for me. Yes! That is what I have learned about my heavenly Father in the absence of my earthly father. He knows the plans he has for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future. I will call upon Him and come and pray to Him and He will listen to me. I will seek Him and find him when I seek him with all my heart. (Jeremiah 29:11-13)
My relationship with my daddy was never perfect, he had problems, and so did I. But my relationship with my Abba can be perfected because of Jesus' sacrifice. Even though our relationship was difficult, I have always been a daddy's girl at heart. I longed to know I was special and cared about. Although my daddy wasn't always able to show me that in ways I needed, my Abba can.
I am sometimes envious when I see a daddy and daughter together. I wish I had a daddy here on earth. But even if daddy were here it would take work to honor him and have a good relationship. I thank God He has placed father figures here on earth, but maybe I haven't invested the energy to develop the relationships I would desire. I think I'm scared of being abaondoned again.  Do I put forth the effort to embrace a relationship with my heavenly Father? Probably not, or I would be more healthy and whole now, more like Jesus. I am so thankful that he who began a good work in me will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus....and He's so patient with me! I am so thankful that he will never leave me, even though my daddy 'abandoned' me by death, my heavenly Father will not. Jesus conquered death to give me life and a relationship with my Abba Father!

So, If you are a daddy-realize how important you are in the life of your child. If you have a daddy, be sweet to him! If you don't have a daddy, rejoice that you can have a relationship with your heavenly Father!

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